About Us
The Half-Asser's Guide to Half-Assing is the brainchild of the overly aggressive, anxious, and a little neurotic oldest brother of the McAlear family.
Let's be clear about the term "brainchild." Just because he thought of it first, does not by any means imply that he does any of the work or is superior in any way. Those accolades belong to the middlest brother, Emry. Read more to meet the members of this whole-ass-kicking half-ass team.
Introduce your team
Here's that team
Emry
Clearly the Smartest and most talented
Damn Right. You name it, he does it... except for anything creepy... he stopped doing that stuff a few weeks ago.
Earl
Master of Duct Tape and Afraider of Electricity and Water
Earl can lift heavy things. He also finds a way to inject comments about his cross-fit workouts in every conversation.
Evan
Spray Paint Scent Tester
Evan is a hard-core bender of his opinions and is a true follower of leaders.
Elex
Key Delegator and Sound Boom Guy
Elex can't decide if he wants to be above average or below average. So, he chooses to be diehard average.
Erin
Static Electrician
Erin is a fan of things she's interested in. She also holds the distinction of being the only person to compete in the state finals in Javelin, shot put and high jump. Not a lot of throwers can jump.
Elyn
Enforcer.... and Carnival Performer
Elyn is the smallest but toughest in the group. Her little carnival performer hands are as fast as lightning which gave her an advantage on her college Volleyball team.
Egan
TBD when we get around to
Egan is the leader of a society so secret, nobody knows it exists... and he wants to keep it that way. We only know about it because we saw it on his business cards.
Frequently Asked Questions
How are you guys so f*****g funny?
We follow Steve Martin's advice. Every day, we replace our socks with slices of bologna. That way, we just feel funny.
You are all so GD appealing from an intellectual, elegance, and physical beauty standpoint. How do you have the strength to limit yourselves to one romantic partner each.
It ain't easy. It ain't easy. Sometimes, we go out of our way to be less appealing in an effort to give other people in this world a better chance. This only makes us look like rebels... which makes us even more appealing. We can't win.
Is there some way that we can be as witty as you?
Practice, my boy. Practice. Once you've reached 10,000 hours of practice, you will earn virtuoso level of skill. Wait, what? .... What was the question?
Half-assing sounds a lot like laziness, lack of skill and motivation. What is your theory on procrastination?
We'll answer that one later.
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